2001-05-13

generate a new entry. even now, in the dark cold dead of night. it is five minutes near 6 am. sunday morning. mother's day, 2001. (The Future is NOW!) mother's day is always more intimidating when you forget to get something for mom. so i've got to call her up and say 'happy mother's day', and then send her something late maybe? and oh, i think i also just missed dad's birthday! just remembered that right here, now.

see all the truths forgotten that come boiling up to the surface when you write? all kinds of unknowns, dead weight, hysteria, unconscia, bubbles of memory previously blocked, and detritus come pouring out like sewage from a big black pipe at the edge of the city, into the surrounding river.

hardie, the guy i'm working with, just woke me up and told me something that i was supposed to do. someone who called, or something. i said, 'yeah, sure,' and he was off to the bathroom. i just intercepted him on his return from the loo to have the conversation again. this was mainly because i had no idea what i had agreed to, having just woke up from the reclining position on my super duper office chair. all groggy, i must be an inspiring workmate, indeed!

yesterday on steinway street at this little toy store which was also a bag and luggage store (gotta love queens), i was compelled by a force beyond my physical knowledge to buy a 'pokemon' pencil sharpener. the pokemon is 'bulbasaur'. Yeah! the first pokemon. #1. and he sharpens pencils like you wouldn't believe. you could easily kill a man with the pencil tips i have now. i worry that someday bulbasaur won't sharpen quite as well as it does now, today. ahh, but that's in the future, and who has time, really, to worry about tomorrow? The Now is So adequate and consuming as it is, isn't it?

So bulbasaur was purchased with the last (but not the last) of my money, and kelli at my side. She now knows a little bit further the depths of my geekiness! and i couldn't be happier with my expenditure. why i've been sitting around with dull pencils surrounding me for months! forced to write with pens!

on a similar note, i bought off the street a bootleg copy of Pokemon 3, videotaped from the theatre and brought directly to my home viewing system. but that's old news. well, the movie's pretty good anyway, you can sort of jump right into the pokemon movie universe, as long as you've seen the cartoon. you don't need to see Pokemon: The First Movie or Pokemon 2, is what i'm saying.

will go back to sleep soon for the remainder of the night. Oh! item! i got a date in the new theatre in Long Island City's newly opened 'the space'. I'm having a show, june 8th. friday night. 8 pm. what's gonna happen? well i dunno. some good stuff i guess. Think Andy Kaufman meets Cat Stevens in a 13th century chateau to discuss the shackles of Buddhism. ...

Life is all sorrow. Joseph Campbell says: " This is the experience of the pain of being alive. Where your pain is, that's where your life is. So find it."

also, Arthur Rimbaud is in my quiver these days. i'm attracted to all things french. painters, films, critics, philosophers. He flows with adoration for the ancients, for women, for lasciviousness. he wrote his most famous poems when he was 16, and then he quit writing in his 20's.

so that makes me feel that maybe this diaryland, full of budding young angst ridden prepubescents, isn't such a bad spawning ground for mass writing. Who will be the first Diaryland Star to reach critical appeal?

im babbling like an idiot now. time to go.