2000-11-15

hey hey Mild gretchen i only included you on my links because you said you wanted to be as uncensored as possible. So i'm helping you out eh? PSA --> (public service announcement) "go read mildgretchen, she's dead on"

sshhhhskkkshhk. static.

well, today was a good day at work. my friendly co-worker and i are having a very nice time co-working. the nite has been passing slowly. had to cut phone calls with both off-the-cuff and lesotho short because of duties to the job.

but now work is mellow. and oh, i was so happy because today's the 15th, and that means i get my paycheck instantly delivered to my account. (so friggin desperately needed you don't even wanna know ...), but i went out to buy a sandwhich around 4 am, and i realized that the money doesn't clear until at least 8 in the morning. So i wait some more for a time. what the hey, i've only waited like 5 days already to eat a decent meal. can wait a coupla more hours.

No, its not been that bad, just splurged last week and forgot about the consequences. And i've been forced to rely on my own resources and stockpiles of food. I made cheddar cheese and split pea soup last nite while watching 60 Minutes II. (Like One wasn't good enough? of course not!) And that was good, ym ym. the soup. well, Dan Rather and Charlie Rose were good as well.

I'm at Victory Road on Pokemon Gameboy. It's the final countdown (Swiss rockers Europe can attest!) the final fury, the final testament to pokemon training greatness. Will it end in Glory? or fall apart in bitter defeat? well, if it does end badly, its cool cause i save it of course, play again. There is no real *losing*.

This is the metaphor of the day. Video games with no real losing, except the phantom loss of one of your lives. one of your "guys". you always have more. and even if you run out of guys, there's always some potion that revives them. Or another quarter gives you 3 more.

Eastern beliefs make our afterlife, our western notions of "mortality" seem like a joke. A phantom. Well, hey, you just come back again. Its a fun game! But it wouldn't be so dramatic if you didn't play along like you thought you might die. We invest into our phantom lives, our guys. That's the fun of the game, to act like we care, to put ourselves in the place of that guy. (the old nintendo game Metroid keeps coming to mind, or that commando game.) and then when he dies, we just sigh, and say a quick prayer for his digital soul, and brace ourselves to start again with

guy #2. or guy #(x + 1).

bigger guns, bigger machines, eh, logos fiend. let's keep it going. this dialogue.

love to everybody especially offthecuff who will be visiting the city (and me) very shortly! yay!!