2001-01-27

well in the course of a year and a half in new york what has happened to me?

I've now got 100 glossy photos of me as a potential model. i've got like 20 good songs written. I've got a coupla hundred business cards with my name on them, just arrived today. I've got the rise and final downfall of my first real live relation ship under my belt. I've got street cred. I've lost a little bit of wait. jeez i haven't been on a scale in years, but i probably lost 5 to 10 lbs, maybe.

I've had my notions of granduer reduced and inflated over and over again. I bought a really cool plate at a pottery fair. my cd collection has grown in leaps. my record collection has been inseminated, and in a few short months has grown like a spore. (cheapie but great finds are all over the sidewalk). i've got a studio to go to think.

i've got a lovely lady maybe visiting me in a few days. i count her high among my blessings.

I've been meeting people like crazy since the year began, specifically in the last week. like all of the sudden, a shroud was lifted, the one year period of my mourning, my own personal dumpsville. And things haven't been this fun in ages. well, not incredibly amazing, but pretty fun.

There was the Bulgarian Disco last night, where we danced and geez, i thought, i should go out dancing everynite! what else do i have to do??

and just got my first joy division cd, "still". why do i wait so long to do these things?! i wanted to buy one of thier albums like 4 years ago. and of course i wait until i find it in a library inventory sale for 2$. (but whatta steal!)its so good. they remind me of the fall. and that one song "they keep calling me" that trent reznor redid of course.

um oh, yeah: stay on course. What has new york taught me thus far? YOu can do anything or nothing. either way , time will go by.